Building Bridges, Not Walls: The Power of Positive Co-Parenting: Some Practical Tips

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Positive co-parenting is essential for the well-being of your children after a separation or divorce. It’s not always easy but it is important so here are some ideas to help.

Here are some tips to help you co-parent effectively and create a positive environment for your children:

Put Your Child’s Needs First:

Remember that your child’s well-being should be the top priority in co-parenting. Make decisions that are in their best interests, even if it means compromising with your co-parent.

Open and Respectful Communication:

Maintain open and respectful communication with your co-parent. Keep conversations focused on the child and avoid discussing personal issues or conflicts.

Consistency and Routine:

Try to establish consistent routines for your child between both households. Consistency provides stability and comfort for children during times of change.

Be Flexible:

Life can be unpredictable, so be flexible with the co-parenting schedule when necessary. Be willing to accommodate changes due to work, school, or unexpected events.

Cooperate on Discipline:

Consistency in discipline is crucial. Discuss rules, consequences, and expectations with your co-parent to ensure your child receives consistent messages in both households.

Respect Each Other’s Parenting Styles:

This is NOT easy but important. Recognise that you and your co-parent may have different parenting styles. As long as these styles are not harmful, try to respect and support each other’s approaches.

Use a Co-Parenting App or Calendar:

Consider using co-parenting apps or shared calendars to keep track of visitation schedules, school events, and other important dates. This can help avoid misunderstandings.

Keep Adult Issues Separate:

Avoid involving your child in conflicts or disagreements between you and your co-parent. Keep adult issues separate from your co-parenting relationship.

Stay Positive and Encouraging:

Encourage your child to have a positive relationship with the other parent. Speak positively about your co-parent in front of your child, and avoid making negative comments.

Attend Parenting Classes or Counselling:

If needed, consider attending parenting classes or counseling together to improve your co-parenting relationship and communication skills.

Plan Special Family Time:

Occasionally, plan special family activities that involve both parents and the child. This can help your child feel secure and loved by both parents.

Seek Mediation if Necessary:

If conflicts persist and communication breaks down, consider using a mediator or therapist to help facilitate productive discussions and reach agreements.

Follow Legal Agreements:

If you have a formal custody agreement or court orders, make sure both you and your co-parent adhere to them. This provides a clear framework for co-parenting responsibilities.


Take care of your own physical and emotional well-being. When you are mentally and emotionally healthy, you are better equipped to provide support to your child.

Be Patient and Persistent:

Co-parenting can be challenging, especially in the beginning. Be patient and persistent in your efforts to work together for the sake of your child’s happiness and stability.

Remember that co-parenting is a long-term commitment, and your child benefits most when they see both parents cooperating and showing love and support. Keep their best interests at heart and focus on creating a positive and nurturing environment for them.

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