The Behaviour Blogs Part 7 ~ ‘Tuff Luff’
Posted by: Sue Atkins
Ms Tuff Luff believes that it’s her job as a parent to set boundaries.
She sees her child’s job is to test those boundaries.
She knows that kids will make mistakes because that’s normal and that’s what kids do !
She believes that her kids should be encouraged, nurtured and allowed to make mistakes without judgement, finger pointing or feeling a failure. She wants to help her kids experience success and achievement.
Sometimes being loving is a tough job and she believes that her kids need her to say “No” sometimes to them and to mean it.
She also believes that the problem is the problem …… not her child. Her children are more than the problem, and she looks for ways to teach her kids that. She may not love their behaviour, but she loves her children unconditionally … and they know that.
Her strategies are to:
Help her kids make better choices.
She teaches her kids to be responsible for the choices that they make because she believes, in the long run, they learn far more from that, than her just disciplining them.
She constantly looks for ways to help her kids succeed and she applies sanctions without any grudges – it’s never personal just about the behaviour she is trying to teach them.
The outcomes to her style are that her children learn about her boundaries with respect and dignity.
They learn to take more responsibility for their own behaviour and learn self discipline faster.
Her home is a happy one where everyone knows where they are, as the boundaries are obvious and the consequences are clear if they break them.
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