The Magik of Metaphor……

I love metaphors as they are a great way to pass on our values, our beliefs and our ethos and philosophies for Life to our kids through telling simple stories.

I use them to get the parents I coach pondering and reflecting and even musing!

That’s why every Wednesday I write a Wednesday Story to encourage this simple way of thinking about your parenting.  

Metaphors give us plenty to ponder and are a wonderful way to teach our kids important things in a simple way. They are also a fabulous tool for enhancing and fine tuning our parenting – which is where my passion lies.

So how do these metaphors develop? Who gives them to us and what can we do to change them if they no longer serve us as adults?

In fact have you ever stopped to ponder your metaphors for Life?

Well if you haven’t don’t beat yourself up – not many people do but I think it’s refreshing, empowering and fun to explore them…..

As children we begin to understand and organise the world through our experiences and we pick up most of our beliefs about ourselves and the world through what our parents teach us, say to us and the way the act themselves as they of course are our primary role models.

But perhaps what we picked up was a bit limiting, restricting or constraining or even down right unhelpful and now we are older and parents, may be something we don’t want to pass on to our own kids!

I like to think of my brain as a filing cabinet,  and when we are children we open the files and label them.  We often spend the rest of our lives putting new material into these old files. 

If our childhood was healthy, full of positive experiences and inspiring then we may have a pretty good filing system.  If it was a struggle, full of negative experiences and difficult then we often see struggles for the rest of our life.

For example some parents see life as a battle.  Every encounter is a struggle, and if they don’t win, they feel like they have lost.  Others view life as an adventure.  A new day brings new opportunities to explore.  If something goes badly today, there’s always tomorrow. 

The metaphors we are given as kids don’t have to be what we stay today or even what we have to pass on to our kids – but we have to be self aware about what we are passing on consciously and more importantly unconsciously.

So …..what are your metaphors? 

Grab a cup of coffee and a pen and pare and start to have fun noticing your metaphors….

A Mission – We believe that we have the truth and we need to convince others that our point-of-view is right. 

A Journey or an adventure – We travel from place to place meeting new people and exploring.

A Building – Starting with a solid foundation, then adding floors and rooms.

A Roller Coaster – Life consists of ups and downs, and we are along for the ride.

 A Stained-glass window – full of light and colours.   

A Mountain Climb – Life consists of hierarchies.  We are always climbing the corporate ladder

A Race – always finding the fastest route, “keeping up with the Jonses.”

A Courtroom – Everything in life should be fair.

Stepping Stones – We barely get comfortable where we are before we are looking for better job or a bigger house.

A Prison – Feeling like we don’t have choices, like others have all the power.

A Classroom – There are always new lessons to learn.

A Battery – Every encounter seems to drain energy.  We need the weekends to recharge

Do you recognise yourself in any of these?

These are just a few of the life metaphors that run people’s lives.

What metaphors fit your life? 

Do they work or do they cause problems and limit your choices? 

 It’s possible to change your metaphors if you have worked out what they are.

 Good mental health, happiness and success include having life metaphors that work.

If you’d like to rceive my Wednesday Story each week download my Parenting Made Easy App and it will be at the touch of your fingertips.

For less than a latte get my Parenting Made Easy App  – more helpful than Mary Poppins, Mrs. Doubtfire or Nanny McPhee  ! http://itunes.apple.com/app/sue-atkins-parenting-made/id439743586?mt=8