At What Age Should A Child Say Sorry?

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Posted by: Sue Atkins

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In this episode:

At What Age Should A Child Say Sorry?

Every Year, An Estimated 280,000 Children, Experience Family Separation. Take the #ParentsPromise To Help Them.

Sue Atkins Chats to Jason Wilkin & Simon McCune from Ray Lighting – The World’s Healthiest Electric Light Bulbs About the Dangers of Flicker and Blue Light

Listen to the Expert Interview

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This Episode’s Sponsor :

The amicable co-parenting app exists to reduce conflict and confusion between co-parents by providing tools that improve communication and offering advice that helps separated couples navigate co-parenting issues.

The app helps parents  to manage all aspects of co-parenting in one secure place, making parenting after divorce and separation simpler.

The app includes :

  •  Co-parenting advice – book a call to speak to one of our co-parenting coaches, either alone or with your ex-partner, to work through common co-parenting problems.
  • Co-parenting calendar – stay organised and on the same page. Track individual and shared events, including school drop-offs and pickups, medical appointments and school holidays.
  • Co-parenting goals – Set personal and shared goals to keep you both focussed on the future and able to manage each other’s co-parenting expectations.
  • Messaging function – a popular feature that allows co-parents to keep their messages in one place and away from WhatsApp, personal and work emails.

Start your 30-day free trial to explore all the benefits of the app: amicable.io/coparenting-app

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Parent’s Promise

The process of separation is failing millions of children and parents, across the UK. Every year, an estimated 280,000 children, a similar number to the size of the population of Newcastle, experience family separation.

‍It’s one of the greatest, least-recognised, health risks to our children.

‍The Positive Parenting Alliance is a group of organisations, and individuals, who believe that all children deserve the most positive experience possible during parental separation or divorce.

Our aim is to create a genuinely child-focussed society and better systems to ensure the long-term wellbeing of children when parents separate.

For children, whilst separation will bring inevitable feelings of loss and change, they can still thrive if their parents work in partnership to create the right conditions.  We know that children are more likely to adapt with fewer problems, and less emotional distress, when parents are able to part with compassion and continue to work together in partnership even when they are not together.

No 1 mental health issue for children

The primary reason for children being referred to counselling are the effects of family breakdown (Fegans 2020). ‘Ongoing family tensions’ is one of the most common presenting issues in primary-age children who are referred for Place2Be’s one-to-one counselling (67%).

The #ParentsPromise helps parents make a positive commitment to their children today, in case of a relationship breakdown tomorrow.

The changes we are calling for:

Every child has a need to be loved by both their parents and their wider families, the right not to have to choose one parent over the other and to be shielded from conflict and adult conversations. They have the right to have both parents working together to create the conditions for them to succeed. They have the right to be a child.

I am proud to support The Parents Promise

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Read my articles on Amicable

  • Advice to help teens adjust to your divorce
  • Practical do’s & don’ts for successful co-parenting by parenting expert Sue Atkins

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Answer

“Sorry seems to be the hardest word,” sang Elton John & it is only 5 small little letters that can have a BIG impact from Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey to politicians the world over but why is a genuine apology important and how do we go deeper and teach children not to just utter the perfunctory & begrudgingly ‘sorry’ to their brothers and sisters or classmate in the playground?

Being sorry is important.

It teaches a child to learn to take responsibility for their own behaviour and words. It redresses a mistake, a wrong doing or a fit of anger. Being able to say sorry takes courage to admit to getting something wrong. President Trump of course finds it impossible to admit he makes mistakes & we all know someone who

The goal behind an apology is empathy, redressing a mistake & and then learning to try to change that behaviour for next time.

Why say sorry?

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Sue Atkins has published some simple, inexpensive, and practical Conversation Cards to help children and families talk about Divorce.

Here are just a few of the questions kids ask regarding Divorce :

What Did I Do Wrong? …

What Can I Do To Get Mum and Dad Back Together? …

What Should I Do When It Feels Really Bad? …

What Will It Be Like After the Divorce? …

Where Am I Going to Live?

Will I Still See Grandma?

Where Will I Go for Christmas and my Birthday?

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