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“So what do we do? Anything – something. So long as we don’t just sit there. If we screw it up, start over. Try something else. If we wait until we’ve satisfied all the uncertainties, it may be too late.”
~ Lee Iacocca Former Chairman of Chrysler Corporation
Communication is essential at any stage of your child’s development, but it is particularly important during the transitional stage of adolescence. So here are a few tried and tested tips for talking about drugs to your teenager:
So bear those questions in mind before you start to talk with your teenager and plan what sort of things you’d like to say and visualise when and where you’re going to speak with them – notice your body language and your tone of voice and imagine everything going really well and see yourself and your teenager looking relaxed.
Navigating conversations about drugs with your teenager can feel overwhelming. You want to protect them, but you also want to foster trust and keep communication open. The key is to create a safe space where your teen feels heard, respected, and empowered to make informed decisions.
Here’s how to approach this sensitive topic with confidence, along with conversation starters and scripts to help you along the way.
1. Start Early & Keep It Ongoing
Conversations about drugs shouldn’t be a one-time talk. Start early with age-appropriate discussions and keep them going as your child grows.
Tip: Use real-life situations—like a news story or something from TV—to naturally introduce the topic.
Script Example:
“I read an article about teens being offered vape pens at school. Have you ever seen anything like that happen? What do you think about it?”
2. Create a Judgment-Free Zone
Your teen is more likely to open up if they feel they won’t be judged or punished for sharing their thoughts or experiences.
Tip: Focus on listening more than talking. Validate their feelings, even if you disagree.
Script Example:
“I know this can be an awkward topic, but I want you to feel like you can talk to me about anything—no lectures, just honest conversation.”
3. Talk About Peer Pressure
Teens often face pressure from friends or classmates. Equip them with strategies to say no confidently.
Tip: Role-play scenarios together to help your teen feel prepared.
Script Example:
“If someone at a party offers you something, what do you think you’d say? Let’s come up with a few easy ways you can say no without feeling awkward.”
4. Share the Facts, Not Just the Fears
Teens value honesty. Instead of using scare tactics, provide real information about how drugs can affect health, relationships, and future goals.
Tip: Research together. If your teen questions something, suggest looking it up as a team.
Script Example:
“I know you’re smart enough to make your own choices, but I want to make sure you have all the facts. Let’s check out what this actually does to your body.”
5. Be Honest About Your Own Experiences (If Appropriate)
If you feel comfortable, sharing your own experiences can make the conversation more relatable—but keep the focus on lessons learned, not glorified stories.
Script Example:
“When I was your age, I faced similar choices. Looking back, I wish I had understood more about the risks. That’s why I want you to have all the info I didn’t.”
6. Discuss Consequences Without Making It a Threat
Instead of using fear-based tactics, talk about the real-life consequences of drug use—both legal and health-related—while also addressing the emotional impact.
Script Example:
“I’m not here to scare you, but using drugs can lead to problems you might not expect—like affecting sports performance, friendships, or even future job opportunities.”
7. Keep Communication Open After the Conversation
Let your teen know they can come to you anytime if they feel pressured, curious, or worried about something they’ve seen or heard.
Tip: Reinforce that reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Script Example:
“No matter what happens, you can always come to me. Even if you think I’ll be upset, I’d rather you talk to me than feel like you’re alone in figuring it out.”
Quick Conversation Starters:
“Have you heard about the new laws around vaping? What do your friends think about it?”
“If someone you know was struggling with drug use, how would you help them?”
“What kind of pressures do you think teens face today that I might not understand?”
Final Thoughts:
Talking about drugs with your teen isn’t about controlling them—it’s about guiding them to make smart, safe choices. By staying calm, being honest, and keeping the dialogue open, you build trust that lasts far beyond this one conversation.
Remember: Even if your teen seems disinterested or dismissive, they’re listening more than you think. Keep the door open—you’re their greatest guide.
If a serious problem ever develops, remember that it will always be down to more than drugs. It will not necessarily be down to just you either! Look out for early signs that something is bothering your teenager – it could be a problem with school, friends, their environment, being bullied, exam pressure or even your teenager’s mental disposition.
Keep in mind that you can offer advice and support to your teenager but they may not accept it. Just be patient, persistently supportive and show unconditional love.
It’s an important step to want to talk about drugs with your child, so pat yourself on the back for taking the initiative.
Communication and an open attitude is vital throughout the years of raising your children and ideally begin to discuss some of these very important issues when your child is still young and mature enough to understand.
Ask yourself:
Drug services do not just offer help to teenagers, they are also there for parents who need support and will be very happy to answer any of your questions or offer suggestions about tackling difficult topics.
By talking you are building bridges not walls
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