Are You Failing Enough?
Posted by: Sue Atkins
I often talk about “failing forward” when I am coaching parents and here is my article on “Failing” that was published on the Jo Frost Super Nanny site
Many people are held back by a fear of failure. They hold the perspective that failure means they aren’t meant to succeed, and that they aren’t good enough.
But failure offers us a perfect chance to learn and improve. Without failure we wouldn’t know what areas we need to improve on.
Thinking of failure in a better way helps ease the pain of making mistakes & getting things wrong. Seeing it as feedback helps ease the discomfort & it gives you an opportunity to learn what can be done better going forward.
People rarely get things right straight away or the first time. Unexpected things happen and we make mistakes along the way.
Getting from where we are now to where we want to go always require a few detours, and these detours offer us a chance for growth and lead to developing our character.
Failure shows us that we are trying new things and pushing our limits beyond what feels easy and comfortable.
In essence, failure helps us reach our potential.
Failure leads to wisdom
We learn a lot about life and who we are when we’re willing to take a chance and experience what the world has to offer. The more we experience the more we learn about how to effectively handle life’s ups and downs.
We also learn about our values and what is most important to us. Failure can really make you reflect on what your life purpose is, and what you’re meant to do here.
Failure leads to personal growth
When we begin to grow as a person we are going to experience a learning curve and moments of naivety. No matter what the aptitude, whether artistic ability, athletic ability, or social skills, it will require growth and learning.
This means a little failure is required to get to a proficient and knowledgeable level. Failure is just a part of the process of expanding our abilities and skills.
Failure leads to resiliency
Even though most people wouldn’t sign-up to experience struggles and overcome obstacles, these are often some of the most valuable times in our life. When we hit rock bottom and can bounce back we begin to see how emotionally strong we really are.
When we realise we can handle more than we thought it helps us gain self-confidence and trust in our abilities.
Failure leads to compassion
Compassion comes when we can connect with what others are going through. If you’ve never been through it, you can’t fully know what it’s like.
If you’ve lost a job, a loved one, or a major opportunity, and see someone else going through this pain you are more likely to feel compassion for their experience.
Failure helps us connect with others in moments of disappointment and be more likely to take action and help.
It also teaches us humility.
When we can view failure as an essential part of personal growth, it helps us expand our view of what we’re capable of. It helps us realise that learning is a part of reaching our goals and that this requires some moments of uncertainty and disappointment.
Alfred Adler the Austrian psychiatrist talked about the courage to try & this innate drive & desire will ultimately make us stronger in the long run.
So, don’t drive forward looking in the rear view mirror – take the learning & lesson & get back up & have another go.