I’m on the ‘Good Morning Britain’ sofa with Piers Morgan and Susanna Reid tomorrow morning at 7.20 discussing the new ban in France on parent smacking their children.
Throughout my 10 years of being a parenting author this is the topic that generates the most controversy.
I remember writing about this topic in my first book ‘Raising Happy Children For Dummies’ and I offered absolutely loads of alternative ways to discipline children, as we all know they need firm, fair and consistent boundaries around them. Children actually feel safer when they know the rules and know the consequences.
But I am amazed by how many parents don’t sit down and actually write down what is / what isn’t acceptable to them and chat about it together.
If your kids don’t know your rules how can they behave in the way you want them too?
Children are either motivated towards something or away from something – so towards stickers, extra playtime, another story at bedtime or away from something like no ipad time, not going to a friend’s to play or being dropped 5 minutes late to football practice. Of course all of this is age appropriate.
But once you have some firm, fair and consistent rules, let your kids in on them and let them know your consequences, from here your family life settles down and things get easier, as everyone knows where they are .
You really don’t have to hit your child to discipline them.
I have a FREE APP called Sue Atkins’ Parenting Made Easy which is bursting with my tips, techniques and strategies to help you. You can download my Parenting Made Easy MP3 downloads around disciplining your child positively, and ways to use my ‘EASY BUTTON’ Technique instead of the ‘Naughty Step’ which doesn’t work for teenagers anyway !
DO GO AND EXPLORE MY WEALTH OF RESOURCES to help you find alternative ways to raise happy, confident, well behaved kids -> CLICK HERE
You’ll discover my PAUSE BUTTON TECHNIQUE, my CAMCORDER TECHNIQUE, your triggers, the barriers to your confidence, the importance of your tone of voice, body language and attitude, influences that your own parents had on you growing up.
Here’s an extract from my book ‘Raising Happy Children for Dummies’ to start you off. Give me a call on 01883 818329 if you’d like me to help you.
Alternatives to Punishment
Change takes time and loads of practise! So forgive yourself if you make mistakes and revert back to old habits. Just feel pleased you are now aware of other ways to bring up your children or speak to them. Just start again.
Let’s look at what discipline and punishment means to you:
How were you disciplined?
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How do you feel looking back on that discipline?
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Do you want to repeat that pattern with your children and how would you feel if you did?
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Are you aware of other alternatives? What are they?
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What is the purpose of discipline and punishments?
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What motivates you when disciplining your children – fear, respect, control..?
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What do you think your children feel when you are disciplining them?
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