Getting boys to open up and talk to you – my advice on Parent Channel TV
Posted by: Sue Atkins
As you know I am one of the parenting experts on the wonderfully informative Parent Channel TV and my article about Getting boys to open up and talk to you is live on their blog today.
Getting boys to open up and talk to you can become a little harder as your children mature, and scientists still aren’t sure whether the differences are due to nature or nurture, but the differences do seem to exist between boys and girls, and I know first hand as I have one of each!
One difference that’s especially noticeable to parents of boys is that it can be harder to get them to open up in communications with you about their emotions and feelings.
My son happily talked sport, school or cricket but, compared to my daughter, was less open about how he was feeling.
If you’re the parent of a son whose door to chatting seems more closed than it is open, don’t despair.
Understanding why your son doesn’t feel comfortable discussing his emotions with you can help you relax and feel more confident around this whole area. I have found by being more flexible myself and putting the book down that I’m reading, or just being available to talk when my son is ready, means that we do get those “magic moments” where we chat, connect, and where I can support him when he needs me to.
It’s not about forcing your son to open up but all about relaxing and making sure your son knows that when he’s ready to talk, you’ll be there to listen (regardless of the time!).
Often, I found engaging in a physical activity such as playing football in the garden or having an evening of Monopoly, or something that my son enjoyed, made him open up easily and more naturally without a feeling of pressure. So find a simple activity where you are both relaxed so the conversation can just flow naturally.
Why Boys Don’t Express Themselves Easily……..
Boys have lives that are just as full and complex as those of girls. They may seem more distant or aloof sometimes which may make it hard for you to engage in heart-to-heart conversations but many parents that I coach make a mistake when they assume that their sons either aren’t having any troubles or aren’t interested in discussing what’s on their minds.
In reality, many sons would relish a closer relationship, but are held back for the following reasons:
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