SAPS 98 Coping With The Early Days of Single Parenting.
Posted by: Kevin Mulryne
Get it on iTunes Get in on Android
In this week’s jam-packed episode!
The O2 finding about the REAL age kids have full access to Facebook, Snapchat & Instagram, get a mobile phone & stay at home alone – the findings will shock you!
Are Smartphone Clauses for Nannies a good idea?
What makes a Great Grandparent?
Coping with the Early Days of Single Parenting
I am in conversation with Thérèse Hoyle, Positive Playtime Expert and Best Selling Author of 101 Playtime Games
To listen to the full interview – please click here
Connect with Thérèse
Thérèse’s Books are available to purchase from her website
Don’t Stew – Ask Sue Parenting Q & A
I will be shortly releasing some Quick Win Video clips around the role of Grandparents and the importance of their role in looking after their grandchildren; but for now, here are some notes for you.
When you’re asked to look after your grandchild
How you handle a request to look after or do child care for your grandchild depends a lot on how you get along with your grandchild’s parents!
Here are my tips to help you agree on child care arrangements:
- Honesty and openness is a good place to start the discussion. For example, if you’re not sure that you can manage one long day each week, let your son and daughter in law know what you are willing to do – ‘I can’t do 7.30 am to 6.30 pm, but I can do an afternoon each week’.
- Planning for sickness and holidays right from the start is a good idea. You could talk about back-up care for when you or your grandchild are sick, and when you’re away on holiday.
- Sometimes these discussions can get heated. If this happens, it might be best to suggest talking about things when you’re both feeling calm.
- Parents have a lot to juggle – work, family, relationships and more. Sometimes they feel like they’re not managing. If your grandchild’s parents are desperate for a break from your granddaughter and you can’t help, you might be able to suggest other options. For example, ‘Have you asked Sara’s parents?’ or ‘Perhaps you could make an arrangement with other parents from mothers group to take turns looking after each other’s children?’ Book a Babysitter recommended by some Mums or long term care – book a Nursery Place or a Childminder…..
- If you’re looking after your grandchild or doing child care, it might help you to know about your grandchild’s usual routine and rules. Asking your grandchild’s parents before you make changes shows respect for these rules and routines.
- If you’re looking after your grandchild in your own home, it’s OK to have your own house rules. For example, ‘Don’t go outside by yourself’.
- If looking after your grandchild late at night is affecting your rest, staying at your grandchild’s house, or having your grandchild sleep over at your house, might be a simple solution.
Here is a recent article I have written that I hope you will find useful
First weeks as a single parent: feelings and challenges
When you become a single parent there’s plenty of change to cope with. You might be dealing with the reality of single parenting, or the challenges of co-parenting as you and your former partner adjust to the new situation.
The uncertainty can lead to all kinds of strong emotions. You might feel anger, sadness, frustration, fear, shock, guilt, regret and grief for the life you once had.
On the other hand, you might feel relieved, hopeful or excited about your new life. Some newly single parents say they feel liberated from the conflict and stress of negotiating with a partner.
Check out my “Process Not An Event” article
Check out my “7 Stages Of Recovery During A Divorce”.
It’s challenging – but it can also be a time for learning about yourself and finding new directions.
Focusing on your strengths, acknowledging how you’ve coped well with challenges in the past and setting realistic goals can all help boost your confidence and resilience.
If you’ve just become a single parent, you might feel that your world has been turned upside down. It’s challenging, but there are things you can do to manage this big change in your life.
Give yourself time, recognise what you do well, and ask for help when you need it.
Free ebook, The Positive Parent Daily Workout
Simply enter your details below to get your very own copy of “The Positive Parent Daily Workout” and learn tips and tricks to use every day with your own children.