The ‘Never Enough’ Problem & How To Get Rid Of It.
Posted by: Sue Atkins
I’ve been working a with a lovely busy Mum helping her re – connect with the fun of being a Mum of two young children. Tiredness, lack of sleep, lots of worry can rob us of the joy of being a parent.
She’d fallen into the rather negative spin cycle of thoughts that we all can fall into at times if we are not careful or mindful enough. It’s what I call the trap of the ‘Never Enough’ Problem.
The Never Enough Problem
Never good enough.
Never thin enough.
Never clever enough.
Never pretty enough.
Never rich enough.
Never successful enough.
We could all fill in the blank of “never __________ enough.”
But there is an answer to the ‘Never Enough Problem’: cultivating an Attitude of Gratitude.
So I told her about my Gratitude Jar.
Having what I call, ‘An Attitude of Gratitude ‘ can literally transform your life. I am naturally a glass half full sort of person but I work, and have worked, with a lot of people who see the glass as half empty and this negative attitude can become a habit that can rob you of joy, happiness and peace.
So learning to cultivate ‘An Attitude of Gratitude’ is what makes the glass half full. It reminds you that you have enough, and that you are enough, and that you are blessed in so many simple ways.
I always say to the people who work with me ‘Change happens quickly, but habits take a little longer!’ So changing your mindset takes a little practice but, like all great things that are worthwhile, you’ll soon find you get rather good at it after awhile !
So what is a ‘Gratitude Jar?’
A ‘Gratitude Jar’ can be as simple or as ornate as you fancy. I found an old-fashioned glass jar and bought some red velvet ribbon which I tied around the middle. Every day, sometimes several times during my day, I wrote down what I was grateful for and I added these “Gratitude Notes” to my jar.
And remarkable things have happened.
I felt truly happier, more at peace with my life and less anxious, frustrated and dissatisfied and because you get what you focus on, I found more things to be grateful for!
We all have ‘off’ days and that’s when you can dip into your jar and pull out a note that will lift your spirits, make you smile and remind you of how lucky you really are.
I talked to the lovely Mum about the smile of her 7 year old, the giggles at bath time, the ‘magic moments’ when her son runs into her arms after a busy day at school bursting with news.
We talked about adding photos of happy holidays, little pictures the kids had drawn, noticing sunsets, blue skies, and listening to birds sing. We talked about the smell of newly mowed grass, a great chat with a friend over coffee, a great Pilates Class, a lovely meal in with her husband, we talked about noticing the aroma of freesias, getting on with her Mum over Christmas and the smell of mince pies.
The list became endless.
So why not give it a go ?
What have you got to lose except your negative attitude ?